25 Years Later...

Today, August 30, 2008, marks a big day in the life of Ava Holt. It's not her birthday or any common holiday...instead, today Ava is the exact same age (to the day) that I was when I came to America to be a part of the Allen family. It sounds cheesy, but the reality of my adoption has really started to sink in lately. I've always known that I was adopted but I never thought about how significant my adoption was to all of the parties involved (to my foster family in Korea and to my loving family in America). I've always been extremely thankful to my birth mother for her selflessness and ability to see past herself and her needs, wants, and desires in order to give me life (i.e. not aborting me) and then going further by giving me away in order for me to have a better life somewhere else in the world. On the flip side, I've also always been incredibly thankful to my wonderful adoptive parents and brothers for their selflessness and ability to open their hearts and lives to the orphan that they barely knew anything about at the time. They have loved, cared for, and nurtured me since before they even met me, and they are the only family I know, love, and call my own. I couldn't have ever even dreamt of having a more phenomenal family than the one I was blessed to have been chosen by 26 years ago. I've been given countless opportunities, an education with 2 degrees, and I've been given more dreams than most people could ever imagine having.


Anyhow, the reason I've been thinking about my adoption lately is because of Ava. I can't even begin to imagine giving her away and never seeing her again and I can't even begin to fathom missing out on the past 9 months, 4 weeks, and 1 day of her life. Having her in my life puts my past in such a different perspective and makes me even more thankful for being adopted.
It hasn't been until today that I can ask my mom if Ava is anything like me...if she was the same size as me, had the same amount of hair or teeth, or if she had the same personality or mannerisms as me. As much as I haven't wanted Ava to grow up, I've really been looking forward to this day because I'm so excited to know if this little 20lb incredibly beautiful baby girl is anything like me. She's so much like her Daddy, which makes my heart smile, but there's always been a part of me that's wanted to know what characteristics I gave to her.


As a surprise, my mom sent me a package filled with some of the things I came to America with on my Gotcha Day (the day I was adopted) and some of my clothes. However, the best surprise inside the package was the outfit that I flew to America wearing. Of course, given today's significance, I got the privilege of letting Ava Holt wear it over 25 years later. She looks so precious...

Here she is with 'Monkey Chee Chee,' my beloved comfort item as a child (she was in the package too)...